Make fun of you, dear lady? Perish the thought. Well, tell me: have you ever licked a lamppost in winter?
alistair + romance
(Source: , via -alistair)
Maybe this is too fast, I don’t know, but… I know what I feel.
• please let me take my sexual frustration out on your sweet virgin penis • bored housewife
“That’s what I’m here for. To deliver unpleasant news and witty one-liners.”
• no but there is a certain lamppost i know i want to lick
Various reasons why Alistair Theirin is perfect